"whip-cracking sheets of rain / up the mizzled hills and over family graves. / Clambering clouties plat the naked limbs of Ballyphillip's gorse-bearded jawline."
"...rain-darkened and tested on the teeth - bramble-bound"
Wow! These lines are just epic, Conor -- a description of setting that feels ancient and mysterious. You use words I have never seen, but can easily decipher. I appreciate so much that you do not explain or define for your reader. As a child, I read all the Oz books ( L. Frank Baum) and the fact that I didn't understand much of it, only served to expand my ability to imagine -- as does your writing. Thank you.
Thanks so much Sharron - I have read before that you should never underestimate the intelligence of the reader. I hate being hand held through a narrative, and really enjoy being lost! Trying to stay true to those maxims . . . its a fine line sometimes! But I enjoyed writing the post-script to provide a 'little' context this time - I might do that again, depending on the poem of course - hope you are keeping well by the way!
Not quite as good as yours - seriously though the last six lines are achingly beautiful and I love the expanding shape of the typography, like a storm gathering force.
You are expanding my universe. CJ. I had to look up several words in order to appreciate your exquisite imagery. Just the sound and flow of the words are enough to stir the heart, but understanding adds depth.
I had a laugh at my wife's granda (who's 91) - within 10 minutes of the power going out, he was off sky news 24 and straight onto a transistor radio he's had from the 1970s - ABBA blaring - proving that technology addiction is truly multi generational!
Thanks so much Misty - don't miss the passage I put in the post-script; I tried to add a little context for the poem (but not too much!) - really glad you enjoyed it!
Haha - thanks Bence, such great praise from such an accomplished wordsmith as yourself. I'm surrounded by talent on this platform, it's only natural that some of it rubs off on me - its the best metaphorical coffee joint around!
The search for a definition of "clouties" led me down some interesting rabbitholes! Apparently pagan leaders encourage the use of biodegradable clouties... thank you for a fun morning! Also, thank you for the moving poetry. I'm glad you escaped major damage.
Thanks so much Jeannine - glad to see someone following the 'clouties' rabbit hole! If you ever come to Ireland and you see a tree covered in ribbons, now you'll know!
Thanks Joan - no chapbooks yet, but I am starting to look at local literary journals and I have a collection of short stories in progress - I was lucky enough to win a grant from the Arts Council late last year for a collection of short stories - I really shouldn't be spending any time on poetry - but it's hard to ignore the muse!
Thank you so much Joan - I have friends in Wichita, you guys know a thing or two about the wind! Wow - what a creative family - I'm only beginning to find my feet as a writer, trying to build my confidence - so this is such a lovely comment! 👍
We moved a few years ago. Yes, the wind is constant, and during the winter the wind chill factor is awful. I was there when they caught the BTK killer. That was a day for rejoicing.
I once read about him --- a period of time, not one book ---- and honestly believe that in his case the death penalty should be applied. if out, he would kill.again in a heartbeat. It's his belief that he possesses an extra Y chromosome that makes him more "male": thus, a natural predator that society should, if not adapt to, acknowledge. it was only natural that he should do what he did. I think he was stupid. That's why they caught him.
"whip-cracking sheets of rain / up the mizzled hills and over family graves. / Clambering clouties plat the naked limbs of Ballyphillip's gorse-bearded jawline."
"...rain-darkened and tested on the teeth - bramble-bound"
Wow! These lines are just epic, Conor -- a description of setting that feels ancient and mysterious. You use words I have never seen, but can easily decipher. I appreciate so much that you do not explain or define for your reader. As a child, I read all the Oz books ( L. Frank Baum) and the fact that I didn't understand much of it, only served to expand my ability to imagine -- as does your writing. Thank you.
Thanks so much Sharron - I have read before that you should never underestimate the intelligence of the reader. I hate being hand held through a narrative, and really enjoy being lost! Trying to stay true to those maxims . . . its a fine line sometimes! But I enjoyed writing the post-script to provide a 'little' context this time - I might do that again, depending on the poem of course - hope you are keeping well by the way!
Eowyn put trees in the ditch
Eowyn your a nasty ....
Not quite as good as yours - seriously though the last six lines are achingly beautiful and I love the expanding shape of the typography, like a storm gathering force.
Well done!
Cheers Graeme - All the conversation these days orbits the weather - we're starting to sound like a couple of old biddies! Hope you fared well!
You are expanding my universe. CJ. I had to look up several words in order to appreciate your exquisite imagery. Just the sound and flow of the words are enough to stir the heart, but understanding adds depth.
Thanks KC - and thanks also for the restack - you'll become an honorary Irishman with all this niche local knowledge!
May your Clouties always be biogradable…
Absolutely Richard!
"The wren receives her own chorus - hollow the bones -
having swallowed the lone red rose: silk and sexless and"
That is a flawless stanza. Absolutely perfect. Great poem, man.
Thanks so much Joe - its a great feeling when someone highlights a line or a stanza they particularly liked - glad you liked it!
'Show me a storm
that’s not a jealous lover' .
So many great lines in this poem, C.J.
I witnessed this ferocious storm too. Fists of air, fits of passion ⚡
Thanks so much Síodhna, and for the restack - it was a truly staggering storm wasn't it!? The birds were flying backwards!
Ha ha, yes C J and the black ducks were mixed with the birds! The damage was done to the trees, and by them.
I had a laugh at my wife's granda (who's 91) - within 10 minutes of the power going out, he was off sky news 24 and straight onto a transistor radio he's had from the 1970s - ABBA blaring - proving that technology addiction is truly multi generational!
That's funny, we can forgive the aural and audio a little. The radio and music are soothing. (And perhaps more wholesome addictions?)
Coffee, candles and cherades!
Yes, yes and yes.
Wow, the voice of this is amazing. Many unfamiliar words, but the sounds alone—just wow. I think I got the general idea! Off to google now.
Glad you and yours're safe!
Thanks so much Misty - don't miss the passage I put in the post-script; I tried to add a little context for the poem (but not too much!) - really glad you enjoyed it!
This is just so wonderful and so full of beautiful libnes and such an ache in the writing. I got this. Great work.
Cheers Douglas - I'm glad you liked it, and I hope you were well shored up at the weekend.
I have no words. Absolutely astonishing
Cheers Bence - really glad you liked it!
I didn't just like it. I loved it
Haha - thanks Bence, such great praise from such an accomplished wordsmith as yourself. I'm surrounded by talent on this platform, it's only natural that some of it rubs off on me - its the best metaphorical coffee joint around!
Glad you and yours made it through the storm relatively unscathed. That's great. Quite like the poem as well ;)
Cheers B - nothing like bonding with a hurricane survivor to make me feel like I've truly made it!
Haha! Oh yes. Through the joys of extreme weather!
Transportive, living poetry, full of song
Thanks Caroline - I think it must be the time of year!
The search for a definition of "clouties" led me down some interesting rabbitholes! Apparently pagan leaders encourage the use of biodegradable clouties... thank you for a fun morning! Also, thank you for the moving poetry. I'm glad you escaped major damage.
Thanks so much Jeannine - glad to see someone following the 'clouties' rabbit hole! If you ever come to Ireland and you see a tree covered in ribbons, now you'll know!
Amazing! Do you have a chapbook?
Thanks Joan - no chapbooks yet, but I am starting to look at local literary journals and I have a collection of short stories in progress - I was lucky enough to win a grant from the Arts Council late last year for a collection of short stories - I really shouldn't be spending any time on poetry - but it's hard to ignore the muse!
I write short stories. My husband is the poet. He has two chapbooks and one novel.
He was the Director of Creative Writing at Wichita State and I've entertained a lot of poets who came the spring fellowship. . Wish we'd had you!
Thank you so much Joan - I have friends in Wichita, you guys know a thing or two about the wind! Wow - what a creative family - I'm only beginning to find my feet as a writer, trying to build my confidence - so this is such a lovely comment! 👍
We moved a few years ago. Yes, the wind is constant, and during the winter the wind chill factor is awful. I was there when they caught the BTK killer. That was a day for rejoicing.
I just googled BTK - that's a face I won't forget for a while 😶
I once read about him --- a period of time, not one book ---- and honestly believe that in his case the death penalty should be applied. if out, he would kill.again in a heartbeat. It's his belief that he possesses an extra Y chromosome that makes him more "male": thus, a natural predator that society should, if not adapt to, acknowledge. it was only natural that he should do what he did. I think he was stupid. That's why they caught him.
Cheers Keith!